Sometimes, who am I?

There are times, where it is dark inside me, when I think about Ani's injury, and what has been denied to her. There are times when all my human inequities, failings, spite, anger and fears are directed at her injury. Who am I at these times? Do I recognize myself? I fight to never let this spill over into how I relate to Ani. Ani is _not_ her injury, but it is part of her right now. God help me to trust more in you rather than listen to my own fears.