May the train take you...

I look at your train, my son,
Percy has a permanent smile.
If only he knew what happened to one of his fans,
His fire inside would falter and suffer, as mine has.
The sight of it,
The sound of it,
My son, I can close my eyes and hear you play.
My son, I remember changing all the batteries,
as I performed that small service for you.
Oh how I wish God's train could take you back here,
and let me serve you again.
Percy would certainly rust, crying the tears of our loss.
Nate, I don't always cry with memories of you,
just most of the time.
My son, I cry for myself, for mommy, for Ani, for this world.
Even if it were never to have come to pass,
I ask God to show me how you would have turned out here on Earth.
How tall you would have been,
How loving you would have been,
How many puzzles you would have finished.
My son, the greatest puzzle I think,
is how we affect each other,
how we enrich each other.
As a parent, that puzzle is ever so more complicated.
I don't know how heaven works,
but come to me on the station when my train arrives.
Percy is going to bring me, with a smile.