Observations

I sometimes just say "Nate-Nate" over and over in the car because my mouth misses saying it. It makes me cry.

There are times where I want to think my pain is bigger than other people's. Like "I know pain that you have never felt". I don't know where it comes from because more than anything I want to be understood.

Some things about Nate that stick out for anyone who did not know him on Earth:
o Without ever being asked, at 2 1/2 years old, he started helping me load/unload the dishwasher.

o He started helping me unload the shopping cart while he was still sitting in it.

o I could never get him to understand that as I was holding him, just before placing him in bed, when I would say "Hug and kiss Nate", that it was me that wanted to hug and kiss him. Instead he would hug and kiss me. Even when I would say "No, _Daddy_ hug Nate and _Daddy_ kiss Nate" he would still hug and kiss me first. I happily gave up trying to correct him and relished in his displays of affection and displayed mine to him afterwards.

o The women at Nate's daycare would give him the puzzles to put bak together at the end of the day because he was faster than they were.




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